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I haven't felt this confused for such a long time. For once, it's not about girls (which makes a subtle change). You see, I have been having trouble with my faith recently. It seems everything I believe in has been turned on its head by what I've read. It was a bit of a lame book, but I read 'The Science Of Discworld', and 'Angels and Demons' by Dan Brown. Are science and religion mutually exclusive? Is it one or the other? Does Darwin's theory of Evolution undermine God? Or does it reinforce the wonderful majesty of an infinatly benign and wise Lord?
Now for the crunch. Has anyone heard of the number PHI? 1.618 (I think). Also called the 'Most Beautiful Number In The Universe' and 'God's Building Block'? If you haven't, then its also known as 'Gold Cut'. Its a ratio, and eerily crops up all the time in nature. If you measure the length of you're arm, and divide it by the length from your elbow to you're fingertip, then you get PHI. Same if you divide the total height of yourself by the height from your navel to the floor. It crops up so much. Like in a Pentogram - all the time confused for it's Satanic connotations; it was originally the pagan symbol for the divine feminine. If you notice the fact that the ligns in the pentogram are bisected by lines within the symbol... the ratio of the bisected length's is PHI. The planet Venus (named after the Goddess of beauty) traces a perfect mathematical Pentacle in the sky.
Coincidence? I think not. Yet... It seems there is a lot that I don't know. Why has the Catholic Church (as in, the Christian Religion as a whole) supressed knowledge, endorsed evil regimes, decieved the masses and oppressed? Yet at the same time driven so many to be better people and do wonderful works of kindness? I have never been a massive fan of organised Religion, its all a bit 'Establishment', and not how I would have imagined God to have organised it at all. Religion is an amazingly powerful thing... dealing with Doctrine and Laws, yet oppressing and warring.
I still believe in God. He exists, how can I trust the Bible? Its all so hard to figure out. Was Jesus truely the Son Of God, or a Prophet? Does this make me a lousy Christian for asking these questions...? Think I need to talk to someone about this. Hmm.
Anyway, recently things have been going really well, I got through to the next stage of Apple interviews for a job as a Mac specialist, and as it happens so did all my housemates :-) So, its off to Manchester tomorrow with us all to mess around and have a group interview. I'm actually stoked! I can't believe it :-D Will also got his PSP. And WHAT?!?!?!?!
The PSP is the most awsome-est thing I have ever put in my hands... but that's enough geek talk ;-) oh oh oh! watched Team America tonight tooo. Coz will bought it today with his new PSP game ;-) That film never gets old or rubbish :-D
right, I'm off to watch Sin City and have a little to eat. night night!
oh yeah, I realise that I'm listening to a Gremo (not quite grebo, and not quite emo) tune, but it fits my mood pretty well :-)
August 15 2005, 18:51:48 UTC 6 years ago
nah not at all dude, if anything it makes you a better one, because you are actually opening your mind to the possibility of other ideas, and in my eyes, making yourself more alert to the world and yourself as a person (if that makes sense..). god gave you the ability to make your own choices and morals, so no matter if you doubt the bible, youre just fulfilling what he gave you (if you believe in him). and anyway, the bible isnt really god's words anyway, its moses's interpretation of what god said, which in turn has been translated and lost meaning millions of times. and dont even get me started on the new testament... ultimately in my eyes the bible should never be taken fully literally, as this is what leads people to hate, and not open their minds to other choices. the bible to me is a collection of stories to guide people in their lives, not to control them, as you said about organised religion (evil, evil thing).
im sure whatever youre going through with your faith will get better, it may just take a while to understand what you fully believe, whether it be the whole bible, the old testament, or just the morals it gives us. personally i dont even question whether there is a god, because i'll never know, and if i'd been born on a desert island, i'd never have been told about jesus, i could just live my own life as best and honorable as i could, which is what i do.
what ive ended up saying may have been no help at all, because im not too good at articulating what i really mean. i just wanted to say you shouldnt feel bad for questionning the bible, as in my eyes, it is what 'god' would have wanted you to do (if he actually is aware when creating the universe that we would be here now). he gave you wisdom and the ability to question yourself, so why not use them? you can see what unquestioned belief has done to extremist people, or fundamentalist people..
hope things turn out ok man xx